[The room is an artifact. A living fossil. A window to another time. The lime green cabinetry and rounded fridge emblazoned with a chrome symbol of a long forgotten product line, the brilliant red and chrome formica tabletop and matching chairs. The floral pattern lazy susan on the middle of the table our camera appears to be resting on with a swan-shaped sugar bowl. Everything all polished, shiny, and sparkling. It looks like the place was yanked right out of the 1950's.]
[It makes things all the more jarring when suddenly the lights go out for a moment, then when they come on again someone is sitting in the chair. Tanned, blonde hair in a pixie bob that looks cemented in place, a headband and matching floral print dress, and… oh.]
[The orange eyes and the grin that has far too many teeth, though they're white, overly large, and square instead of sharp, pointy, and/or serrated tell us that this is Claudia Kajara with a wig and a fuckton of makeup.]
[The smile, for once, doesn't reach her eyes and she seems sad and almost on the verge of tears.]
"It's not a fun time for you, is it Joe? With your contributions ignored, your hard work cast aside, and the time and effort you put in unrewarded."
[Despite the sorrow in her eyes, Claudia's voice is strangely happy and chipper.]
"That's okay. Well, you feeling that way. It's not okay to be dumped on. But it sure is a thing that's happening alright."
"Because now is not a fun time. This particular stretch of time has taken fun, wrapped it up in duct tape, stuffed it in George Clooney's bum, wrapped George Cloony up in duct tape, stuck him in a padded wooden crate and shipped him off to that warehouse at the end of Raiders of the Lost Arc."
[Claudia sighs and frowns for a moment before adopting a sad smile.]
"And do ya know why it's not fun? Because people have decided that lying is okay. And not only that it's okay to lie, but that it's okay to deny things that are true. Muddying the waters. If one group says something is true and the other group has decided to lie and say that thing is false they throw up a smoke screen and say that the truthspeakers are liars. They want everyone tarred with the same brush because there are more truthspeakers than there are liars."
[Claudia gives a strange little twitch and a shudder.]
"The world lives in an era of post-truth and DTW and its fellows are living in a post-fun world. People don't want fun. They don't want fantasy. They don't want clowns. They don't want dragons. They want everything to be mundane and bland and boring."
"The world has turned its back on fun, and trying to be fun where it is not wanted is not working. And I can see why."
"One way or another the world wants to return to a place of safety. For one group of people it's to this."
[Claudia gestures around herself and the camera pans to the left, showing the 1950's kitchen, zooming in a bit to focus on the stand mixer and then panning back, still zoomed in, to Claudia who is now off center and partially off the screen. The sound of a chair being pulled out can be heard.]
"This artificial, sterile place that never was. A return to the innocence of their childhood. But it isn't the world that changed, Joe, it was them. They grew up and they want to drag the world back to their imaginary fantasyland."
"That's all we wanted, the Menagerie. To unite and build towards a better, brighter, more exciting fantasy."
"But every time you're left heartbroken you lose something. The crack, the chips, the pieces that are lost and never come back."
"In the end, Joe, the world is too heartbroken to accept fun anymore. And if I can't be fun, then what do I have left as a clown?"
"I can't be a sad clown, the world is already filled with sadness and sorrow and grief beyond measure. I can't be a scary clown because no one is afraid of clowns in whiteface and bright colors anymore. Not since the biggest, orangest horror clown of them all got himself elected and seems intent on dismantling everything that everybody but the richest, greediest, nastiest people need to survive."
[The sad smile again.]
"I can't be scary, Joe, because Red Tides, toxic waste, pre existing conditions, smog, and medical bankruptcies are all scarier than I am."
"So no more clowns. I'll just disguise myself and bide my time. Either the world will go back to being fun again, or the liars will burn it all down and we won't have time to waste on things like professional wrestling."
[A trickle of blood begins to flow downward from Claudia's headband.]
"I get people on Twitter, Joe, telling me to kill myself. Because I'm different. Because I'm a dragon. Because I'm a clown. Because I'm a woman. Or just because."
[Claudia lowers her head and sobs.]
"Do they not think I haven't tried?"
[She reaches up and tries to wipe away the blood, instead knocking her wig off, revealing a four-fingered white hand adorned with scales the color of yellowed bone. The camera pans out to find seated next to Claudia is a second Claudia, though this one is more normal looking, lacking the makeup over the skin and her normal hair color, though it's down instead of up in a mohawk. Her face is adorned only with the draconic "mask" marking and the black of her lips. It seems that some of her coloration is "natural" while others are actually makeup.]
[The "original" Claudia makes the same motions as her 50's double. Or rather the double makes identical motions to the original. Claudia withdraws her claws from the brain of her double, leaving her to slump to the floor, where she seems to be having a seizure.]
[Claudia herself is shaking, the whites of her eyes red from crying. She just about lunges at the camera and roars.[
"DON'T YOU THINK I'VE TRIED?!"
[She brings the talons of her larger, clawed hand over and slashes her arm, tearing it open from wrist to elbow.]
"I CAN'T DIE!"
[She plunges her claws into her bare belly, ripping out her intestines.]
"I CAN'T DIE!"
[She reaches up through the wound, widening it and reaching into her chest cavity, tearing out her own heart, which she tosses on the table.]
"...I can't..."
[She sobs, grabbing the swan sugar bowl from the lazy susan, dumping it over her heart, which she then picks and stares at for a few moments.]
"...die."
[She shrugs and takes a bite out of it, sighing and morosely chewing as her wounds slowly heal and her shed blood flows back into her body.]
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