Name: Von Krieger / Ron
Discord: VonKrieger#9653
Twitter: @KalindaVK
Character Details
Name: Claudia Kajara
Alias: Claudia the Clown, Some mix of the words "creepy" "clown" and "creature," That Madwoman, Pale Dragon, Painted Dragon, Kalinda Junior, Minion, Henchwoman, Herald of the Uttercold, Dark Diva, Singing Siren
Height: 6'0"
Weight: 266 pounds (170 base, 96 pound tail)
Age: 32
Hometown: ?
Picture Base: Custom drawings
Body Type: Busty Contortionist Dragon-Elf-Clown-Thing
Alignment (Face/Heel/Neutral): Neutral
Entrance Music: The opening of "Mrs. O'Leary's Cow" by Brian Wilson into V for Villains' "Pink Elephants on Parade"
Wrestler Entrance: The madcap, zany opening of "Mrs. O'Leary's Cow" by Brian Wilson signals the arrival of a half dozen clowns emerging from various places, scrambling to the top of the entry ramp accompanied by brightly colored lights and spotlights appearing all over the arena.
One crawls out from under the ring, two run out from opposite sides of the stages, one rappels down from the top of the Jumbotron, one jumps out of the audience, and one appears to have been hiding under the announce table this entire time and has to dive through the ring in order to get up there.
The clowns have come bearing musical instruments, a pair of trumpets, a trombone, a tuba, a french horn, and a kazoo. They all draw in a deep breath and belt out the opening notes of "Pink Elephants on Parade."
A pyro charge detonates on the stage behind them and V For Villains rendition of the song kicks in as Claudia walks into the arena. She smiles her too-wide, creepy smile, striding out to stand amongst her fellow clowns, who continue to play her theme as the whole lot marches down the ring ramp with Claudia using her parasol as a marshal's baton.
Claudia hops up on the ring apron and strikes a sexy pose before puffing out her chest and pulling on the flower on her lapel. She gives it a sniff, then invites the kazoo player to smell it. The buffoon does so.
The lights go out and the music is replaced by an ominous, hellish drone. Claudia is no longer smiling. Her flower does what a clown's flower always does; squirting somebody in the face. Her clown companions screams, clutching his face as dark red liquid spurts from between his fingers, shreds of skin and flesh hanging from his acid-seared face.
Then the lights are out again, and just as abruptly as they've gone, the lights and comedic music are back, Claudia is all smiles, and the kazoo clown is merrily toweling his face dry with a brightly colored handkerchief.
Claudia rolls under the bottom rope, pushing herself up into a handstand, then tucking into a roll that propels her across the ring. She springs to the top rope, tightrope walking to a corner with ease, dancing to the beat of her entry theme, rounding the corner and walking out to the middle of the ropes on the side of the fixed camera.
She drops down onto her backside, tosses her hat flying into the crowd with a flick of the wrist and hangs upside down from the top rope, spreading her arms wide, as if to hug the collective audience, and smiles her big, unsettling smile.
(The violent fates of Claudia's clown minions change every week. I'll write new ones for each entrance she makes.)
Gimmick/Personality: Unsettling Singing Clown-Dragon-Thing
Imagine what would happen if you put the Joker and an eldritch abomination in a blender, stirred in some undeath, poured it into a dragon-shaped mold, and let it cool in the fridge for three hours.
Great, now imagine what would happen if you gave that abomination a children's TV show where it simultaneously remained, nice, polite, and cheerful, and yet still managed to have its murderous rage and unholy nature leak through enough to scare the bajeezus out of everybody.
Now make it fanatically devoted to a big blue dragoness who has spent the last three years being professional wrestling's chew toy and has decided that every day in DTW is Bring Your Minion to Work Day, and that Claudia is very protective of her mistress and wants to make sure she is a nice and happy draggy, and not a sad and angsty draggy.
Now remember that Kalinda is in fact a necromancer and likely finds a bouquet of her enemies' skulls with the spines still attached to be a thoughtful gift.
Having fun yet?
Wrestler’s Strengths:
Ridiculousness Incarnate
Claudia is basically a human cartoon character and thus benefits from all the ridiculousness that comes from it. She's able to do almost anything, provided that the end result is funny or amusing to somebody.
Mostly this shows up as a combination of horror movie monster offscreen teleportation and Batman-esque stealth hi/bye type things. The moment Claudia is off camera she can reappear just about anywhere and the other people in a scene with her don't notice until she is actually back on camera proper.
She also has a limited capacity for utilizing Hammerspace, being able to pull objects from basically nowhere. Out in the arena this is limited to sane, rational things that could be accomplished with slight of hand, but backstage this can extend to literally pulling a carnival mallet out of a skin-tight outfit.
Blood of the Dragon
Having been made Kalinda's dragonspawn henchcritter, Claudia has a lot of the same benefits from dragondom that her boss lady does. Claudia is faster, stronger, and tougher than one would expect from her body type and she has a rather hefty tail.
Claudia's a different sort of dragon, though. While Kalinda is ice elemental based, Claudia is some sort of creepy, quasi-undead necrotic dragon.
She's nowhere near as tough as Kalinda, and is much easier to wear down or knock out. But unlike Kalinda, Claudia recovers on her own obscenely quickly. If she's not focused on constantly she recovers with astonishing speed.
Attempting to focus on a body part doesn't really work on Claudia, as one sustained period of offense from her will have her back to almost one hundred percent by the time you can get some moves in again.
Fighting Kalinda is like fighting a Flying Brick style superhero, you need to wear her down through a long, drawn out campaign of violence while making sure she doesn't hit you. Fighting Claudia is like fighting the Joker if he had Wolverine's healing factor, you can put her down, but you can't keep her down and if you don't pay attention to her she's going to wander off and do something that you find absolutely horrible.
Illusionist, Contortionist, Sadomasochist
Somehow Claudia has picked up a vast number of skills and abilities from somewhere. She's a master at slight of hand and stage magic, coupled with her actual capacity for proper sorcery she is able to do some very strange, unsettling things.
Similarly her transformation has resulted in a physical form that reacts very differently to pain. She likes it. She likes inflicted it. A good submission finisher is like a very strong massage; painful but very relieving.
Claudia will occasionally position herself purposely for her opponent's submissions, give advice during holds on how they need to be made tighter or more effective, or position herself to make the hold even more damaging (IE by pushing her own head and neck back with one hand, yanking back on her own hair, bending herself further back than her opponent will go).
She tends to counter submissions using her unnatural pain tolerance and flexibility. Even something so simple as a headlock will become a display of creepy contortionism, as Claudia will hold herself upright via grabbing her opponent's waist, arching her back, and wrapping her legs around her opponent's neck.
Re: Your Brains
Claudia is a spiritual omnivore, capable of eating lifeforce, emotions, and memories. A long, loving afternoon was spent gnawing on the head of ULW undercard wrestler and former MMA competitor Amber Kendrix, and Claudia's made a light snack of a few others ever since.
Despite having absolutely zero in ring training or experience, she's stolen it from others which puts her on a level of competition with others and as time goes on and she nibbles bits off of more and more people's souls with the Last Caress, her in-ring experience and versatility will only increase.
Wrestler’s Weaknesses:
SRS BZNS
Claudia takes basically nothing seriously. Her objective is primarily to amuse herself. She will do silly, amusing things that are utterly ineffective as wrestling moves. Doing a handstand on an opponent's head, making a pinfall by perching on their chest like a gargoyle, mocking them while applying a submission hold telling them "You can do it!", "Don't tap!", "Just a little bit further!" cheering them on like some kind of freaky, pasty-white motivational speaker.
She'll "play with her food" as it were, pulling up an outclassed opponent from a deciding pinfall to smack them around a bit more.
Delusional
Claudia thinks that she's hilarious, that she's wonderful, and that everybody loves her. Nothing anybody does or says can possibly shake her from this belief. She takes literally everything anybody does as sign of affection, and responds to that affection in kind. Beating her up and leaving her a bloody mess is looked upon with equal affection as treating her to wine, roses, and a romantic candlelit dinner.
On the surface she seems friendly and helpful, cheering on her opponents, giving them motivational speeches during submission holds, helping them to their feet only to beat them back down. In her mind she's the bestest most wonderful babyface in the world that everybody loves to Mary Sue-esque levels, while the reality is that she is a very creepy, unsettling, psychotic bitch.
The Hunger
Being a quasi-undead necromantic entity, Claudia requires additional sustenance to fuel her magic-fueled existence. No one is quite sure what exactly she "feeds" on, but for the most part it seems to be despair, pain, suffering, and general misery. Her goal isn't to win matches, gain glory, acquire titles, or seek fame, but rather her goal is to make her fellow wrestlers as uncomfortable and disheartened as possible.
Physical Appearance: Claudia is a pale pasty white. Think of the palest person you know. She's lighter than that. She is literally white as porcelain with a creepy bone white dragon-esque skull marking permanently etched on her face. Beyond that what is actual coloration and what is simply clown makeup is unknown.
Like Kalinda she sports pointed elven ears and a hefty, reptilian, prehensile tail, though hers ends in a spiked fin rather than a fluffy tuft. Unlike her mistress, however, Claudia has decidedly non-human feet, three-toed with large claws that will not fit in most footwear. It's a good thing that her looks already lend themselves to the clownish so that clownshoes will not be out of place.
She has black hair with colored bangs and a colored mohawk and weird, fiery orange eyes.
Ring Attire: Elbow, knee, and kickpads in alternating shades of bone yellow and pink on a black background, fishnet stockings, a black microskirt, black suspenders, a sleeveless cut off white shirt top that is prevented from wardrobe malfunction by double-sided tape and the crushed hopes of teenaged boys, taped up hands and wrists, a tiny pink and bone yellow tie, and a black bow on her tail.
Regular Attire: Think elaborate, noblewoman Steampunk. Big dresses, corsets galore, goggles, top hats, and there's always her dragon skull mask lurking about somewhere.
Weapons of Choice: Carnival Mallet, the usual repertoire of the comedic clown (pies, water squirting flowers, buckets of whitewash, ladders, unspeakable slavering fangs, etc).
Aside from these Claudia will never, ever use any "normal" weapons. Every typical pro wrestling weapon she would use somehow becomes replaced by something comical, harmless, or food-themed looking, and yet still somehow deals as much damage as the original. (See Barrel of Fun below)
Super Finisher: Super Chaplinsteiner - Top Rope Reverse Frankensteiner from Last Laugh position.
Finishing Moves and description:
None
Claudia lacks a proper impact finisher of her own. But her ability to steal memories from other sentients allows her to use her soul-sucking Last Caress kiss to acquire her opponent's moves. She will frequently nail an opponent with their own finisher immediately following the Last Caress for the humiliation value.
Signature Moves and description:
Last Caress - Set up to finish the match, bending the foe back and planting a soul-sucking kiss on the lips followed by a swinging reverse STO. The dark power of the kiss supposedly drains a foe's life force and allows Claudia to become intimately familiar with their finisher and occasionally their trademark maneuvers, allowing her to both counter and perform them skillfully.
Last Laugh - Inverted back mount triangle choke. Most often a hanging variant with Claudia doing a handstand to keep her foe trapped. Rather allow for a rope break Claudia will yank her victim back into a sort of reverse frankensteiner. She will also, on a standing opponent, before falling back pepper them with punches, slaps, fist slams to the head (banging it like a bongo drum), eye gouging, or head biting.
Claudia prefers to use the combo of the Last Caress and her foe's impact finisher to end matches, but the Last Laugh is also capable of finishing off foes.
Chaplinsteiner - A reverse Frankensteiner done out of the Last Laugh, usually moments before a foe will get a rope break.
Stunt Spectacular - Stunt Rider Stretch, often combined with/used as a set up for the Last Laugh. Often makes motorcycle noises while the hold is applied.
WTF - Modified STF, with Claudia using her legs to hold a modified Indian Deathlock combined with her creepily twisting her torso around almost 180 degrees in order to lock in a modified Stretch Plum. Used as Claudia's primary rest hold.
Three Ring Circus - Rings of Saturn (often accompanied by biting fingers)
Joker Driver - Electric Chair Driver
Mephisto Waltz - Superkick to the throat
Whoopee Cushion - Seated senton to standing (a la Mysterio) or grounded (a la Doink the Clown) opponent.
Hildegarde Hammer - Polish Hammer
Spider Driver - Back to Belly Piledriver
Clownward Spiral - Reverse STO
Bozo Buster - Takes a rubber clown nose out of her pocket, sticks it on her opponent's face, whips them into the corner and executes a Bronco Buster, punching the foe in the face and making the nose squeak with each punch.
Invisible Hand Grenade - Chuck Taylor's move of the same name.
Twisted Taunt - With an opponent lying face down after a devastating move, Claudia will mock them by laying down right in front of them and contorting to bend her back and legs to an extreme degree, her feet planted on either side of her head. She places her flattened hands on top of one another under her chin and grins creepily as her foe looks up into her eyes.
Barrel of Fun - Whenever Claudia goes for some weaponry it ends up… weird. Frightening, terrifying weapons of destruction are instead replaced by something comical and harmless, and yet still seem to inflict damage. Replaces thumbtacks with sprinkles, sledgehammers and chairs with giant lollipops, tables with enormous graham crackers, flaming tables with chocolate syrup and mini marshmallows on the syrup, a barbed wire bat by a stick of cotton candy, etc.
Come Slither, Drakkensteiner, Scorpion Strike: Also being a dragonblood, Claudia uses Kalinda's tail-based trademarks.
Five Moves of Doom:
Claudia's Last Caress and Last Laugh are seen in nearly every match, as are her creepy twisting thing, the Whoopee Cushion, and the Clownward Spiral.
She uses the WTF as her main rest hold.
Please list at least 15 moves in your character's move set:
Lots and lots of kicks
Biting
Tail Lariat
Tail Leg Sweep
Tail Swat
Tail Whip
Stump Puller
Rollup into German Suplex (Chaos Theory)
Repeated smashes of opponents face against the ring mat from back mount
Northern Lights Suplex
German Suplex
Overhead Belly to Belly suplex
Overhead Wheelbarrow Suplex
Cattle Mutilation
Bridging Indian Deathlock
Tiger Wall Flip
Scorpion Kick
Springboard strikes of various sorts
Various arm and leg bars
Mounted forearm strikes
Mounted elbow strikes
Foot choke in corner
Hurricanrana
Frankensteiner
Chop to the spine followed by a kick to the chest on a seated opponent
Repeated Reverse DDT's onto knee into Roll the Dice
Bicycle Kick
Shining Enzugiri
Mocking curtsy
Neck Snap
Eye rake
Punching combination followed by theatrical wind up, leading to an Three Stooges eye poke
Handspring Back Elbow
Wrestler Biography: Once a member of one of the Triad's prestigious wrestling families, Claudia avoided wrestling in favor of higher education. After pulling a few favors she just barely managed to squeak by into a psychology degree.
Willing to do anything for the family, at Raymond der Vaart's request she went to evaluate Kalinda Kriegsdottir for mental fitness. It should have been an open and shut case; after all, dragons weren't real and they didn't have magic. Unfortunately, there was no blue paint and Kalinda didn't end up in a straight jacket as der Vaart wanted.
Instead, Claudia's mouth managed to get her in trouble and the anger that had been bubbling up inside Kalinda after months of mistreatment blew into a dire rage. The dragoness brought out an enchanted weapon from her homeland, one that would rip the target out entirely from living memory. Friends and family no longer remembered her, nor did der Vaart.
Forced to steal from her own kin, who no longer knew her, and live on the streets Claudia attempted to force Kalinda to put her life back to normal at gunpoint. Unfortunately, her attempt at blackmail happened to coincide with a demonic attack on the dragoness, during which Claudia was infected with an infernal sickness known as Abyssal Rot.
A quasi-fungus that devoured everything, yet left it barely functional, the Rot results in an existence of pure agony, trapped in a decayed, broken down, desiccated zombie-like form. In order to be spared constant agony, Kalinda used her necromantic powers to pull Claudia's consciousness out of her body.
Turns out it's rather hard to sustain emotions when you don't have hormones to fuel them. Kal looked for months to find something that might be able to break the demonic curse and restore Claudia to full function, but all that she could come up with was a transformative ritual meant to bind a mortal to a draconic overlord, empowering their weak, frail, scaleless flesh with some of the more powerful traits of dragonkind.
The ritual was a success, restoring Claudia's body and transforming her into a dragonspawn, a half-human half-dragon creature. The ritual was used as experimentation by the Manyfold Matriarch, the cannibalistic dragon goddess that counts Kalinda as her sole devotee, and the Hand of Arimus, an enchanted gauntlet crafted by the God of Death from Kal's homeworld.
Aspects of undeath, faerie, and therianthropic kind were grafted onto the ritual, as well as the blood of a second dragon to grant Claudia alternate abilities, rather than simply duplicating Kalinda's.
Unfortunately, the spiritual bond between Kalinda and her thrall didn't work quite right. Already bonded to a Muse, a Familiar, an Animal Companion, a Mount, a Bonded Weapon, the Hand of Arimus, and the Manyfold Matriarch, the connection flooded Claudia's mind with knowledge and memories that weren't her own.
Force to cope with an influx of untold amounts of information and history, Claudia's mind shattered and spent several weeks slowly piecing itself back together, fully embracing her supernatural status and rejecting her former identity.
What exactly Claudia is no one can really say and what satisfies her eldritch hungers. But it IS known that she attacked ULW signee Amber Kendrix, and upon awakening after having been brutally beaten and her head gnawed on, that she no longer remembers her own professional wrestling and MMA training, as if all those memories were simply sucked out of her.
Which is exactly what happened. All Amber's training and experience belongs to her now. And now Kalinda has decided that professional wrestling can go fuck itself and letting her minion off her leash to actually cause mayhem.
After all, it's not like the world is going to lose anything of value if Claudia chews out the brains of a half dozen egomaniacal dipshit professional wrestlers.
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