Hey chat!
It's been a bit and I've got more to talk about.
Not only do we have New New Girl (who is very definitely not a witch), but we also have New Girl's evil twin. Technically they're not related (Thyra I'm sure would've mentioned having a sister who has been missing for months), but they're actually somehow the same person, or variations of the same person.
Umm… I guess they're different versions of Wayne Gretzky that… I dunno? Play in different positions or something? Despite being so close to Canada by way of Minnesota, I'm not really much of one for hockey. Though it does not have a ball, it's still one of those Sportsball things that I don't have any real interest in.
Except maybe that one NES Ice Hockey RPG that I can't remember the name of, where you go from town to town playing big teams and get into random encounters with minor league teams in short games.
[VK note: Oh wow, apparently the game I'm thinking of never actually got released. Hit the Ice never made it onto the NES, even though it was developed enough to where I read about the RPG mode in Nintendo Power 30-some years ago. Magi meddling apparently made it a thing in the FATE verse, what with the "Stanley Cup" being a thing and all. Veda deserves to be able to play it after all we put her through and will put her through.]
So it turns out we now have a Dwayne Gretzky to go with our Wayne Gretzky. I'm not actually sure which one is the evil twin, as unfortunately they lack a goatee or even so much as a curly sinister
mustache that they habitually twirl.
We are still batting 100 percent with Mascots who are blonde white ladies.
Bad news is that Dwayne Gretzky's been having a lot of bleed over into Lyra, and she's having difficulty remembering things about her previous identity before she got stuffed into a Mascot costume. We also unfortunately had the New New Girl, who gets to be called Madoka because she's not a witch and it will be absolutely catastrophic if she goes over the emotional deep end, well… almost go over the emotional deep end.
Apparently when that happens her head opens up and there are tentacles. Lewd and also very Thing-esque. The horror movie monster, not the Fantastic Four or Addams Family members. I'm trying to wrack my brain trying to figure out what kind of uh… sportsball player of legend of myth she might be. There's like… not a lot of stuff involving tentacles that isn't either hentai (which I sure as fuck hope doesn't get to have Mascots representing it) or shit out of literal Lovecraft.
Which, TBH, fits. Considering that every single Mascot I've met thus far adheres to a particular look, and three of us are uh… not grown. So having a tentacle monster god hop aboard Lord Neckbeard's HP Lovecraft seems to be something that would be right up his alley. Come down into my basement, little girls, I've got a very unfortunately named cat and some popsicles for ya. Just ignore the empty Mascot suits on ice, I'm totally not going to stuff you into one.
Which holds true, because thus far it's six girls and one teen dude.
Oh, speaking of which, Lucy and Lyra are being helped out by a normal human dude with some magical knowledge. Who we met wearing the transbian uniform of shorts and a hoodie in the midst of the sweltering… uh… they probably know what facility we broke out of, but I don't think I ought to mention it.
So let's say that we're in the sweltering New Zealand heat. (See? My tingling Dutch senses work!)
Princess Shrimp-For-A-Butt and Crabby Gabby thought that he was a girl.
So anyway, things got kind of heated and Stabby Junior managed to wander off and abducted a faerie witch right out of her own darned magical circle. The uh… method of subdual mentioned was not what Perry thought it was, and I'm not going to repeat it here where search engines and impressionable young AI plagiarism engine web scrapers can get ahold of it.
Yeah, anyway the Army of Dorkness is uh… stealing the faerie witch's uh… water? To like cool down the servers that are running the Mascot programs or something? Yeah, okay, let's go with that. And I'm not changing faerie witch, because really? That sounds just as hecking weird as something that I would make up as a lie.
Or is it? Maybe Stabby Junior really found a Frog Prince and Crabby Gabby kissed him and underwent carcinization and grew an exoskeleton and now has her crabbiness on the outside for everyone to see as a warning.
Because seriously, she's been going around and hitting people with a shoe and she just damned near choked the Frog Prince to death.
We're all on edge because we found out something today. Like I mentioned, Lyra is having all the bits of her that's her being subsumed into the legend of Dwayne Gretzky (who got recognized by her legendary hockey stick, which is still not a euphemism for penis) and doesn't remember a lot of things. She doesn't even remember how long she's been stuffed into a Servant's body.
So yeah, it turns out us Mascots can go all Bite of '87 when we get too stressed out, which has the potential to lead to an animatronic rampage taking place.
And if we expend too much power or get too stressed, we basically burn up a part of ourselves in doing so and as a result may end up losing who we are to the character we portray.
Which is really fucking scary.
Whose stupid-ass idea was it to give me kick-ass dragon powers and then punish me for using them?
Oh, right. That dipshit Lord Neckbeard, that's who.
Look, I'm a nice girl from Iowa who up until two days ago played video games for a living. But at this point even I want to completely and totally wreck this guy's ass and destroy everything that he has spent his entire life building and pretty much everything within a 1-block radius of this guy.
Meddle not in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.
Fucker.
Sorry for the language, Chat. But I'm very much not in a good mood and I had to break character and yell at some people who just could not FOR THE FUCKING LIFE OF THEM realize that Lyra literally has no capacity to remember stuff. She's not lying about it, she's not being cagey about it, she's not being evasive. We just got done talking about Burnout and how mortal souls in Serv… Mascot shells wear down.
Her character fucking ate her memories you fucking dipshits.
Fuck.
Anyway, I'm not stupid even though I pretend to be on the internet. I've pretty much been in character as Veda fully since the moment I woke up in this body. Everybody else around me was freaking out and panicking and I had no idea what to do, so I went fully into character and haven't stopped since.
But the scary thing is that there isn't a scary thing. Since I woke up I literally have been incapable of feeling fear and I have no idea why. I stuck my finger in the barrel of a gun like something out of a cartoon, in part because there was a goofy meme about it and I thought it would defuse the situation and Gabby was waving a fucking gun around against two teens stuffed into the bodies of literal children.
Guns are fucking dangerous and you shouldn't be waving one around, especially around kids. So I tried to calm her down with goofy shit, with humor. And I stuck my finger into a loaded gun because not only did I think it would help, but because I had no fear.
There was something inside of me that told me that even if the gun DID fire I would be fine.
And I was.
It stung like a bit… biscuit. But I was fine.
And you know the weird part?
If I hadn't been fine, I get the idea that even if it had actually damaged me that I would've been fine too.
I'm pretty sure I've got some Wolverine bullshit going on next to my Dragon bullshit and my Mascot bullshit.
I'm going to use all my bullshit, whatever the flavor, to make sure that the kids stay safe. Thyra and Lyra seem to have their shit together. Gabby very much does not.
You want to know something funny, though?
Turns out that Gabby's body's former occupant really is French.
I've been saying that she's been speaking French just to fuck with her and give her something to focus on that isn't the complete shitshow of our situation.
I want to beat the living shit out of something, Chat, and I'm not sure how much of that is me and how much of that is the dragon destroyer of legend and myth that's been grafted onto my soul.
Hopefully we can point my aggression (and also my cool-ass lightning spear) in a direction where it'll do some good rather than blowing up at other party members and random people we find in the woods like some people I won't mention.
Anyway, catch ya later, Chat.
See ya when I see ya!
-Veda
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